Highlights
Each resident we serve has a unique story and unique needs. But one commonality is the crticial need for on-site supportive services. Here are just a few of their stories:
Jamar
When I first met Jamar he was 14 years old and the star of the show. Whether it was athletics or academics, the kid had his stuff together. About a year ago, Jamar was faced with a pretty tough obstacle in his life. At first, he kept quiet. But eventually his friends found out, and they couldn’t keep it to themselves. After hearing about it, I pulled Jamar aside in my office and asked him about the stuff that was going on. His only response was “Wow… this is weird.” Confused, I asked him to clarify. He paused, then “This is weird for me, having an adult that actually cares and knows when something is wrong with me.”
That day was a turning point for us. From then on, Jamar came to me whenever he needed or wanted to talk. When he was having a bad day we would talk; when he was having a good day, we would talk. I don’t think there was anything we couldn’t or didn’t talk about. Our friendship soon went beyond the walls of our after-school program. But Jamar also knew that just because we were friends didn’t mean that I would let him get away with anything. If anything, in fact, it meant that I had even higher standards for him.
One night earlier this year, I received a phone call telling me that Jamar had been killed in an accident. This call shook not only me, but all of the community where he lived and I worked. Our last conversation was just hours before he was killed. We had talked aboutwhat being a role model meant. I told him that the next day, he needed to bring his “A” game. I needed him to step it up more and help us out. Although these last few weeks have been extremely difficult for all of us, it's also highlighted just how much of a role model he was to those around him and how much his peers respected and looked up to him.
Looking around my community room, I can’t help but smile at the five posters hanging on my walls commemorating his life. It’s encouraging to look around and see the positive things other kids, adults, family have to say about him. I won’t lie; it also makes me smile because I would like to think that I had a role in shaping this young man into the wonderful person he was.
I have also become very close with Jamar’s family. Through all of this, we have been there for one another. I visited last week and one of the Jamar’s family members said to me “We may have lost Jamar but we gained you.” It’s moments like that that help me remember that the time spent with Jamar and the conversations we had were not useless. This kid was doing everything right and I am so thankful to have been a part of his life. And, truthfully, for him to have been a part of mine.
Helen
Since Helen first moved in thirteen years ago, she has been one of the community’s most active members. When you saw her, she inevitably had a smile on her face and she always had a kind or funny word for everyone. At every community event, she was the first to arrive — dressed for the occasion and bringing special music and decorations. She also taught an arts and crafts class, and was always able to work with residents at any skill level.
Last year, things started to change. First, Helen decided holding regular arts and crafts classes was too much for her to do, and eventually stopped offering classes. She stopped attending most building functions, forgot to renew her Medicaid assistance, and began relying on help from others more than usual. Soon, Helen’s smiles and kind words were a thing of the past and she was often confused and forgetful. Phoenix Family staff and the property manager saw these changes and began to encourage Helen to visit her doctor. When Helen finally sought medical help, the doctor discovered that she had had several small strokes/seizures and was also suffering from depression. After a two-week hospital stay, Helen started a new regime of medications and in-home services. With Phoenix Family’s help, Helen began to receive Meals on Wheels and homemaker assistance. Phoenix Family also helped Helen to reapply for her lapsed benefits. After several months of medication and extra support services, Helen is feeling and looking better. Helen recently said that she feels like she “finally has her ducks in a row!”
It has been a group effort to get her through the past year and would not have been possible without her family, physicians, the property manager, and Phoenix Family staff. Because of these collaborative efforts, Helen is able to continue to live independently.
Tabitha
Things were going well for Tabitha. She had recently ended an abusive marriage and was making a new life for herself and her four children. She owned a home and a growing childcare business. Then the economy began to shift and she lost business. Tabitha tried to keep up, but eventually, like so many others, she lost her family’s home and her business.
Today Tabitha lives in one of our communities. She works two part-time jobs, averaging just $9.00 an hour, and is going to college part-time. Things are still tough. She has no health insurance, often has to work after her children have come home from school, and struggles every month to keep up with her family’s expenses, her children, and her jobs.
But, for families like Tabitha’s, Phoenix Family is there to help – providing families with a safety net as they move towards financial stability. Her children attend Phoenix Family’s on-site Youth Development Program in the afternoons – giving her peace of mind in knowing exactly where her children are and that they are in a safe, positive, supervised program. And through Phoenix Family, Tabitha has access to supplemental groceries to make sure her family has food, personalized support services, and a computer lab to help her with her homework and job searches. These services and others combine to help make sure Tabitha and her children stay in their home while they build personal and financial assets and overcome barriers to success.
For Tabitha, things are getting better. She has started to make plans to leave the low-income housing community and find a new home for herself and her children.
Emily
At age 11, Emily was rebelling against everything and everyone. She hated school, hated wearing school uniforms, and hated school rules. She often would come to the Youth Development Program bragging about fighting with other students and cursing at her teachers. She was quick to anger and quick to react violently to anyone or anything that challenged her or that she didn’t like. That anger and violence meant that she was suspended from school on a regular basis. The more she was suspended, the more she hated school.
Today, Emily at 15 is nothing like she was at 11. Phoenix Family’s service coordinator recognized that the anger and behavior problems masked insecurity and a desperate need for attention and boundaries. At that time, Emily thought nothing of being suspended from school, but not being able to attend after-school programming with her friends was devastating. So, she and the service coordinator worked out a deal – she could attend programming, but if she was suspended from school, she had to “volunteer” at the Center. Emily became a regular, cleaning the Center before and after programming. The more she volunteered, the more she opened up to the service coordinator. The more she talked, the more willing she was to listen to advice. Slowly her attitude and behavior changed. Her suspensions became less frequent, and she started to get better grades and talk about what she wanted to do when she grew up.
At 15, she’s learned to control her anger and has become a leader in the after-school program, mentoring younger kids, like Phoenix Family did for her. The one thing that hasn’t changed is that she still volunteers at the Center – only not because she was suspended, but because she wants to.